Saturday, March 14, 2020

Third Trimester Chat

How time has flown. No idea how this happened but I am somehow 39 weeks pregnant with baby boy number two and anxiously awaiting his arrival. The third trimester has been met with a lot more challenges, anxiety and fear than I had being pregnant with Rupert. It has been a whole different pregnancy.

The early stages of the third trimester was met with such happiness, my symptoms were pretty minimal and I was just happy to be coming into the final stage. I guess because I know a lot more about what's happening and what's to come. The inevitable waiting game has begun, the surge of texts every day asking 'Are you still pregnant?' Telling me to 'Hurry up' and the general excitement around a new life coming into the world. 

I have been feeling a huge mix of emotions. My life circumstances this time around are completely different to when I was waiting for Rupert to pop out. I was living with my partner, in our home and everything seemed really perfect. This time around I am living with my toddler and my parents in a tiny room and I am single. I feel a huge gathering of support and love for myself, Rupert and the baby but it being in a different situation brings new worries. What if I can't do it on my own, What if Rupert decides to hate me and What if the baby doesn't bond with his dad? All things that I carry on my shoulders.

As much as this is all weighing on me, I am trying to enjoy my pregnancy. 

So with only a few days to go, I am feeling prepared. Well as much as I can be. The bags are packed, the clothes are washed, a recovery basket has been put together and I have every kind of feeding option available to me.

This Trimester has given me a huge hurdle that I didn't even know I would have to jump over. During my 36 week check up an abnormality with the babies heart was picked up, an Ectopic Double Beat. Hearing those words really scared me, mainly because I had no idea what it was, what it meant or what I would need to do about it. I was sent to the Triage unit at the Women's Hospital and monitored for an hour. Everything was explained to me and now it is something we do have to deal with, after more monitoring this week we have found the baby to still have this. 

Just to balance things out. An Ectopic Double Beat means there is an extra beat in the heart, instead of the regular 'DUN, DUN, DUN,' of a drum you you hear an extra BUMBUM every now and again. It is very hard to explain over text. It isn't something to be worried about and is just something that babies can develop in pregnancy and if they keep it when they are born it is just something they have, it won't effect his life or abilities. I'm trying to see it as an extra beat to love.

The past week I have been experiencing, what I believe to be, slow labour pains and Braxton hicks. I would not recommend these to anyone, they are horrible. The Braxton Hicks are basically contractions that your body has to prepare you for the experience of labour, which I just think it cruel. I've done it before and I do not need to practice for them again. They are so painful and can leave you feeling in such pain and agony for days.

The Slow Labour symptoms are just trickery. They come and go and you're really unsure for a huge proportion of time if you're in labour or not. From severe back pain, aching joints, Bowel problems, Braxton hicks and contractions, exhaustion and general uncomfortable-ness. Slow Labour can go on for days and weeks and potentially doesn't even lead to anything.

But I guess its all going to be so worth it, to have my little boy here. The Third Trimester has been so full of highs and lows, especially when it started with the break up of my relationship. I've had to navigate loosing my best friend, becoming a single mom, moving in with my parents: all this whilst being in the final stages of pregnancy.

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